MOMENTARILY, I AM CONTENT WITH MY DECISION. MY DECISION TO EMBARK ON THIS SPIRITUAL JOURNEY FOR NEW BEGININGS, NEW ENERGIES & TRUTHS.
MY RELATIONSHIP WITH TY JUST SEEMED TO BE HURTING THROUGH THIS DISATNCE THAT SEPARATES US BOTH, THROUGH OUR HEADS CLASHING, THROUGH MISUNDERSTANDINGS, THROUGH NOT KNOWING EACH OTHER WELL. WE HAVE SO MUCH TO LEARN ABOUT EACH OTHER, EVEN THOUGH WE HAVE BEEN TALKING FOR THE LAST 7 YEARS. DISTANCE HAS REALLY PROVED TO ME THAT UNLESS YOU HAVE BEEN WITH THE PERSON IN A CLOSE/FACE2FACE RELATIONSHIP WHERE YOU WERE ABLE TO GROW TOGETHER, SHARE, SEE, FEEL & BE AROUND EACH OTHER....THEN YOU REALLY DON'T HAVE MUCH OF A CHANCE TO LAST UNLESS THE LOVE IS STRONG & BOTH OF YOU WANT TO BE WITH NO-ONE ELSE BUT THAT PERSON THAT IS NOT AT ARMS REACH....NO MATTER HOW HARD IT GETS. LONG DISTANCE LOVE IS TRUELLY A CHALLENGE & I WOULDN'T RECOMMEND IT TO ANYONE, UNLESS UR PASSION FOR LOVE & YOUR PARTNER IS STRONGER THAN EVERY OBSTACLE YOU FACE. ANYTHING IS POSSIBLE...BUT I AM ALSO A REALIST.
I MAY NOT KNOW HER ENTIRE PAST...BUT I DO KNOW WHO I FELL INLOVE WITH FROM DAY1. I KNOW WHAT I FEEL & I KNOW THAT THERE'S POTENTIAL. HONESTLY SPEAKING, I DON'T KNOW WHO I WILL END UP SHARING LIFE WITH. I DON'T KNOW WHO WILL BE THE LAST & ONLY LOVE OF MY LIFE...BUT I DO KNOW THIS RIGHT HERE >>> WHOEVER IT IS, WILL BE VERY HAPPY TO BE MY OTHER HALF. I KNOW THAT MY CAPACITY TO LOVE IS SO GREAT, THAT MOST DO NOT KNOW WHAT TO DO WITH IT B/C THEY ? THE REALISM OF IT, THEY ? THEMSELVES AS TO WHETHER THEY ARE WORTHY, THEY ? WHETHER THIS IS REAL OR JUST A PASSING LOVE. DON'T GET IT TWISTED, IF U FEEL IT, THEN IT'S REAL! POINT BLANK!
I WONDER WHETHER TIME & THE OBSTANCLES "IN TIME" WILL BE ENOUGH FOR US TO MAINTAIN & SUSTAIN THE LOVE WE SHARE ...ARE WE STRONG ENOUGH TO GET PASS THIS....ARE WE INLOVE ENOUGH TO NOT GIVE UP ON BEING WITH ONE ANOTHER, NO MATTER WHAT..?? WHEN YOU LOVE SOMEONE & THEY LOVE YOU JUST AS MUCH ....WHY NOT PERSUE LOVE BY ANY MEANS NECESSARY...WHY NOT FIGHT IN THE NAME OF LOVE...WHY NOT BELIEVE & HAVE FAITH.
RIGHT NOW, TY IS PROBABLY SOMEWHERE IN HER COMPLEX, EITHER AT HOME OR AT ONE OF HER NEIGHBOURS. I WONDER IF RIGHT NOW AT THIS EXACT MOMENT THAT I WRITE MY THOUGHTS & FEELINGS IN MY BLOG, THAT SHE IS LAYING ON HER BED THINKING ABOUT ME.
I MISS HER. ALOT!
BUT...IT FEELS DIFFERENT. IT'S NOT LIKE WE HAVE STOPPED TALKING & COMMUNICATING FOREVER OR B/C WE HAD A FALLING OUT, BUT B/C I FELT IT WAS THE RIGHT THING TO DO NOT ONLY FOR ME BUT FOR BOTH OF US. WE BOTH NEED TIME OUT TO SORT THINGS OUT IN OUR OWN PERSONAL LIVES, SPIRITUALLY & MENTALLY.
AS FOR ME, I NEED CLARITY IN MY LIFE. I NEED TO KNOW WHERE I AM GOING & WHAT I AM AIMING FOR, IN TERMS OF MY FUTURE. THERE IS SO MUCH I REALLY NEED TO FOCUS ON, THINGS THAT WILL BENEFIT ME......
REGARDLESS OF WHAT COMES FROM MY RELATIONSHIP WITH HER, I WILL ALWAYS LOVE HER & BE THERE FOR HER IF SHE NEEDS ME. THE ONLY THING I WILL NOT DO FOR HER OR ANYONE FOR THAT MATTER IS COMPROMISE MY OWN HAPPINESS; MENTAL & EMOTIONAL WELLBEING.
I HAVE MADE ENOUGH SACRIFICES & EFFORTS TO LAST ME A LIFETIME....OR MYABE FOR THE NEXT.
I'M ABOUT TO STEP INTO MY HOT TUB THAT AWAITS ME....SO GWAN GURL.
I'LL BE BACK THOUGH.....P
Posted at 04:44 am by
AlwayzDoubleR
