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Tuesday, November 08, 2005
.:.:. HAVE YOU EVER...? .:.:.
HAVE YOU EVER DONE SOMETHING REAL UGLY, SHADY, SLY, MEAN OR LOW AGAINST SOMEONE YOU WERE/ARE SUPPOSE TO CARE FOR OR LOVE OR VICE VERSA...???
I HAVE TRIED & TRIED TO THINK OF SOME SHYT I MIGHT'VE DONE BACK IN THE DAY TO A FRIEND OR FAMILY MEMEBER SO THAT I CAN TRY & UNDERSTAND WHY A SO-CALLED "CLOSE FRIEND" HAS DONE SOME ILL SHYT TO ME. I CAN'T EVEN PIN POINT IT ON KARMA!!! SEE...COZ IF I HAD, THEN I WOULD THEN SAY, "OHH WELL, IT'S KARMA MEETING ME TO MY OWN IMMORAL CHANT" ...
FRIENDS COME & GO, MY MUM ALWAYS TOLD ME AND YA KNOW, SHE WAS SOO RIGHT!
I ONLY HAVE A HAND FULL OF CLOSE FRIENDS I CAN TRUELLY SAY ARE REAL! I AM CONTENT WITH THAT.
WHEN I FOUND OUT THAT SHE CHEATED ME...BASICALLY STOLE FROM ME, I WAS SOO UPSET, HURT, DISAPPOINTED, ANGRY & INDENIAL. I TRIED TO THINK OF EVERY EXCUSE TO GET HER OFF. BUT REALITY IS, SHE STOLE FROM ME & ANOTHER FRIEND WHO I WILL NOT MENTION. I WAS SHOCKED, BUT DUDE AT RECEPTION BROKE IT DOWN TO ME THE DAY I CALLED TO FIND OUT WHAT THE COST WAS. HE BROKE IT DOWN & MADE IT VERY CLEAR THAT I WAS LIED TO.
I MEAN...DID SHE NEED THE $$ THAT BAD???? THAT BAD, THAT SHE HAD TO STEAL/OVERCHARGE US ON THE SLY..??? SO FUCKIN' SHADY & WRONG! NEVER THOUGHT SHE WOULD DO ME LIKE THAT!!
BUT MAYBE SHE DID NEED IT THAT BAD...MAYBE I CAN'T BE MAD, B/C HAD SHE ASKED ME FOR IT, I WOULD'VE GIVEN IT TO HER. I JUST HATE THAT PPL SO CLOSE TO YOU CAN BE SOO FAKE & OPPORTUNISTIC. I GUESS NOT EVERYBODY HAS THE SAME PRINCIPLES AS YOU ROZ...NOT EVERYBODY VALUES FRIENDSHIP & REALISM AS YOU ROZ....NOT EVERYBODY PLAYS FAIRLY LIKE YOU ROZ....NOT EVERYBODY IS LIKE YOU PERIOD ROZ!
DON'T I ALREADY KNOW THIS SHYT! WHY CAN'T PPL THINK & LIVE ACCORDINGLY LIKE ME. I MEAN, I KNOW I HAVE HIGH EXPECTATIONS WHEN IT COMES TO MY LOVERS/PARTNERS, BUT I HARDLY EXPECT MUCH FROM FRIENDS. NADA, BUT MUTUAL RESPECT, HONESTY, LOYALTY & TO BE REAL. I GUESS THAT CAN BE TOO MUCH FOR SOME.
PEOPLE REALLY FIND IT EZZY TO TAKE SHYT FOR GRANTED TIL IT'S GONE. SHAME REALLY. B/C SOMETIMES IT NEVER COMES BACK A SECOND TIME ROUND'.
ALTHOUGH I AM SOO DISAPPOINTED IN HER & TOTALLY TURNED OFF EVERYTHING....I MISS MY FRIEND, IF SHE'S THAT ANYMORE. WE HAVE NOT TALKED IN A MINUTE. NOT SURE IF WE WILL. IT WOULD HAVE TO BE HER MOVE, B/C I HAVE MY HANDS CLEAN. AND NO, IT IS NOT PRIDE ON ME. IT'S PRIDE THAT'S DISABELLING HER FROM COMING TO ME LIKE A GROWN WOMYN & TELL ME SHE WAS WRONG & APOLOGISE. BUT I DOUBT I'LL EVER HEAR THAT. I GUESS TIME WILL TELL.
UNTIL THEN..... "IM ON MY WAY" LIKE TALIB KWELI SAID IN TRAIN OF THOUGHT....
PEACE!
Posted at 08:45 am by AlwayzDoubleR
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 AlwayzDoubleRAugust 28th Female Australia Add 2 my lyfe if you care...don't just come to stare, but walk bare & feel my glare...my spot to delve deep into my soul...touch me in places I only know....stay free of negative nrg & flow towards positivity...if you feel'n the beat of my rhythmic ancestors that drum congos against my tripple5soul heart...while the hoodie stays over the hed, until you discover & explore me...:peace:...
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Every day counts...
My mood 2day is POSITVE & HOPEFUL
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